An article published in April about Beek's case received international media coverage and sparked a backlash against Ter Beek.
"People think that if you are mentally ill you can't think straight, which is insulting," Beek told the Guardian. "I understand the fears of some disabled people about assisted dying and their concerns about people being pressured to die, but in the Netherlands this law has been in place for over 20 years. There are really strict rules and it is really safe."
Under Dutch law, for a person to be eligible for assisted dying, they must be experiencing "unbearable suffering with no prospect of recovery".
"The longer the treatment goes on, the more you start to lose hope"
Ter Beek's complaints began in early childhood. He suffers from chronic depression, anxiety, trauma and unidentified personality disorder. She has also been diagnosed with autism. "But I continued to self-harm and feel suicidal," she said, adding that when she met her partner, she thought the safe environment he offered would heal her.
"I learned a lot about myself and my coping mechanisms in therapy, but it didn't solve the main problems. At the beginning of the treatment you start hopeful. I thought I was going to get better, but as the treatment goes on, you start to lose hope."
After 10 years of treatment, Ter Beek said that he had nothing left in terms of treatment, "I knew I could not cope the way I am living now."
"I am not blind to the pain of my family and friends"
"I was on the waiting list for evaluation for a long time," Ter Beek said:
"Because there are very few doctors who want to be involved in assisted dying for people with mental suffering. You then have to be assessed by a team, get a second opinion on your suitability and have their decision reviewed by another independent doctor.
For three and a half years I never wavered in my decision. I felt guilty - I have a wife, family, friends and I am not blind to their suffering. And I was scared. But I am absolutely determined to do it.
At every stage, every doctor says: 'Are you sure? You can stop at any point'. My husband was in the room for most of the conversations to support me, but a couple of times he was asked to leave the room so that the doctors could make sure I was speaking freely."
"I feel relieved"
After consulting with his medical team, Ter Beek expects his death to take place in the next few weeks. "I feel relieved, it's been a long struggle," says Beek.
On the appointed day, the medical team will come to Ter Beek's home. "They will start by giving me tranquilizers and won't give me drugs to stop my heart until I'm in a coma. For me it will be like falling asleep. My wife will be there, but I told her that if she needs to leave the room before the moment of death, it's okay."
